Mind of a Blonde

Time to let readers in the Mind of a Blonde, yours truly The Blonde One! Whatever randomness comes to mind I’ll share with you in this segment. Leave your comments and if you have any subjects for the next installment let me know!!

Communication

Lately I’ve seen a lack of communication in a lot of areas in peoples’ lives (from observing those around me, putting these journalism skills to work) and it clearly needs to be addressed. COMMUNICATION. Communication is KEY in any successful relationship, but why are so many people not doing it?

Friendship- It’s great to have people you can chit chat with about things y’all have in common, people you know, etc., but if you can’t be honest with each other then you can’t truly call yourselves friends. I should know, in my group of friends I used to be the understanding, comforting friend (also known as ‘The Enabler’). A friend could tell me “He’s so sweet & nice, Imma make him my new boo!” I know he’s a notorious player and tell her so -but she thinks she’ll be the one to change him. Two weeks later after they’ve slept together and he’s on to the next chick I’m stuck with her being sad and upset, but instead of me saying “You can’t blame nobody but yourself, I told u about him [with the ‘I told you so’ tone]” I would have told her “Oh honey, I’m so sorry to hear that! I can’t believe he was a such a jerk! [really, yes I can cause I told you he was gonna to do that anyway!]”. After years of this I realized my friends are being honest with me so why shouldn’t I do the same?! I can honestly say our relationship is so much better now that in the same situation I now say “So who are you mad at exactly? Him for doing his known routine or yourself for believing his lies?” (sigh) My tongue hurts a lot less now that I don’t hafta bite it anymore!

Relationships- Yeah I’m a single woman but I haven’t been single all my life (people tend to forget that when their single friends {who have been in healthy relationships!} try to give them advice.) In my eyes the golden rule should always come to mind in any relationship –If you don’t want it done to you, then don’t so it to anyone else! My personal issue with that was the last guy I dated cared about more things than I did. For example, I wouldn’t mind if he went out to the club and danced with a few chicks, just no groping, no kissing & no exchange of numbers and that’s what I followed. Him on the other hand NO! lol! If I wanted to dance I should go find him, shake a lil something and go back to my friends or line sisters. O_o really?! After one good time of seeing him nearly tackle (yes, tackle) someone in the club I realized we needed to have better communication. We had other issues to discuss as well so I decided we should do a sort of ‘Pros vs. Cons’ list, in it you write down what you like and don’t like about the person you’re with. We spent a week apart compiling it then came together, discussed it and it helped a lot!! And although he and I didn’t work out that list helped us open up to each other and now we’re great friends! 🙂

I don’t believe keeping your true thoughts to yourself is being “fake”, to me thats too extreme. In my eyes, fake is being two-faced by telling one person something but turning around and telling another something different, while holding back those thoughts is not telling anyone. If you continually retain that information it can be taxing on yourself and later cause stress and anxiety issues. So learn how to communicate!! It can only help you in the end!