Life as the RB: Wisdom, Courage and the Drive to Move forward (part III)

An important thing to do in this stage is to learn you.  A broken heart doesn’t heal itself. It takes the effort of that individual to make them whole again.  This is the opportunity to really enjoy you.  Find out the things you like and don’t like. Living life without limitations places you in a predicament where you get to know yourself more.    
Take risks. Do things you haven’t done. You have all the time in the world to figure out what it is you are all about.  Everybody has something they like doing. Take advantage and fully indulge in it. Being able to live a fulfilled single lifestyle properly prepares you for the time you will need to give to the right one.
Another good thing about this stage is that the RB has the chance to further explore their friendships.  Observe your surroundings and exactly who is a part of it. Who’s really on your team? Go ahead and find out who’s real and who’s fake. This eliminates all potential drama that could affect your future relationship.
In an attempt to move forward, the RB must remain strong in the process of complete rejuvenation. Overcoming something you’ve put your all into takes time to get past. Moving on for the RB requires a little motivation.  The type of motivation that makes you open your eyes, wanting something different. From time to time, the RB should mentally re-experience some of the drama of the past relationship and analyze how it affected them. What did you learn? If a situation reoccurs what tactics will you use? 
Reminiscing on the malarkey shows you how you can handle yourself. Take the knowledge and grow from it. Think of the person who has learned from the mistakes and made more in the process. They ultimately reap the benefits of knowledge and can use it to their advantage. The person you’ll become will know how to deal with the pressures and complication of a negative situation. Most importantly, the RB will be able to leave a situation before it heightens.
Follow me on twitter @_jayhue

Weight Loss Failures and Success: Part II

Weight Watchers may be the right fit for you!

So we can all agree that Jennifer Hudson looks amazing since she lost over 80 lbs. and has gone from a size 16 to a size 6.

Weight Watchers was instrumental in J.Hud losing all of that weight. Now, like I have told you all before I have tried a lot of methods, lots of fat burners and yes, I have tried Weight Watcher’s too! I went to the meetings, I bought the books they sold, I counted my points, I weighed in, and I did everything my group leader and the Weight Watcher’s staff told me to do and it worked! I LOST WEIGHT!!  I lost about thirty pounds on Weight Watchers going from a size 12 to a size 8. I think part of the reason Weight Watchers worked so well for me is because you have to pay to join and pay to weigh-in. I was not about to waste any money so that was an extra incentive to do right by the program.

Does the Weight Watchers Program work?  Yes, if followed the way it is outlined Weight Watchers can and will work for you, but losing the weight and keeping the weight off are two totally different things. So, while I was able to lose weight with Weight Watchers it was extremely hard to keep it off, because the constant point counting was too time consuming and I ended up eating more food than I was supposed to and eventually gained all of the weight back. 🙁 So with that being said, if you are very disciplined then you may very well be able to lose and keep the weight off with the Weight Watchers program. However, if you are like me and would rather spend your time enjoying food, living life, and not stressing over how many points something is worth then this may not be the program for you. Stay tuned for other perspectives on things I have tried on my weight loss journey.

DISCLAIMER: *I am not a medical doctor and I am not endorsing any particular weight loss methods. I am simply sharing my experiences. *

-Miss Tee

Weight Loss Failures and Success: A Personal Perspective


We have a new diva of Health & Beauty here to help you with your weight loss goals, getting fit, skin care advice and making you the best ‘you’ you can be!! Her name is Ms. Tee!
We are a month and a half into this New Year and I wonder how many of us are keeping those New Year’s Resolutions to lose weight and live a healthier life. My weight has fluctuated since high school, so I know the struggle that the average person goes through in order to keep and maintain a healthy weight. Currently I am on my weight loss journey to lose the last fifteen pounds of a thirty-five pound weight goal I set for myself last year.
I have lost weight countless times and I have gained it all back too 🙁 I think I have finally happened upon a plan that is going to be long-lasting and I am so excited to share my story with you!  With that being said, I am going to begin my column here with Blondie’s Lipstick giving you all of my personal experiences as it relates to my weight loss journey. In the next few issues I will let you know what worked well for me and what did not. Hopefully, I can inspire you to become a healthier you because that is the most important thing.
 I am going to be open and honest about everything that I have tried (and believe me I have tried A LOT of different methods to lose and keep the weight off) and I will also share with you my current regimen and let you know how that goes for me as well.

First things first….What did not work!
Starving your body by eating once a day does not work! The first time I decided I wanted to lose weight I
was in 15 years old in the 10th grade. I was not active in any extra-curricular activities. I could not afford a gym membership and my parents were not going to pay for a membership for me. I did not live in a neighborhood where I felt comfortable walking, so I was not getting any exercise. I decided the best thing for me to do would be to change the way I ate. Unfortunately, I had no clue about what I needed to do as far as my diet was concerned and I simply stopped eating. I would only eat one meal a day, usually after school. This worked for a little while and I was able to lose a little bit of weight, but before I graduated from high school I gained all the weight I loss and then some. Needless to say…starvation and eating only once a day is not healthy and it does NOT work!  The reason is because only eating once a day messes up your metabolism and makes it harder for you to burn calories during the day.
There are several other things that I have tried and I will be sharing those with you in the upcoming issues of Blondie’s Lipstick…stay tuned!
Miss Tee

Life as the RB: Wisdom, Courage and the Drive to Move Forward (Part II)

Trying to make the best of an unhappy situation takes focus and courage. It can be done. If you have been following the articles on Stupid Bitch Syndrome you are aware of its dangers. The most important danger being, losing oneself. Once you have accepted to live the life as a Recovering Bitch you’ll reap remarkable benefits that will make you feel like you can overcome any situation.
The RB has to first understand that the road to recovery is in fact a long road. The end of it may take some time reaching. This period of trotting is the perfect amount of time needed to focus on building the self. Take advantage of only having to worry about you. Do things that will ultimately contribute to your happiness. This is not the opportunity to “get loose,” but simply explore the world and live for you.
This journey will do two things. It will either make you or break you. You are officially in control of how you will bounce back from being a SB. Will you return to an unhappy situation or will you better yourself so you can be ready for the happy relationship? In order to successfully recover, right decisions and quick choices will have to be made. Prepare yourself to have to think and act on impulse. You never know what could be thrown at you on any given day. Set yourself up to react accordingly to unwanted phone calls, and apologies.
Your strength will be tested on numerous occasions. Its during this stage where past mistakes reappear. This presents you with the opportunity to not make the same mistake twice. You will get to the point where you will notice these situations and are able to move pass them. Don’t get caught up. A set back is not promising once you’ve reached the RB stage. Stay on top of your game.
There will be some high points, and not to mention the low ones. Music is a way to cope with negative situations. Sounds have a way to be very soothing. Yielding calmness and relaxation is a benefit of listening to music. Cry. Mediate. Breathe. Get it out of your system. Enduring the heartache and reflecting on what went wrong is a good way to advance in this stage of recovery.

Life as the RB: Wisdom, Courage and the Drive to Move Forward

With the New Year only days in, it’s imperative that I start the articles on the Recovering Bitch. I’m talking about all of the people who don’t want to bring that unnecessary, unwanted, drama into the New Year with them. The RB focuses on the self. They must work on ways to make themselves feel wanted and appreciated. This has to be accomplished before they can give themselves to anybody else.
“Out with the old and in with the New.” People love to use this slogan when referring to the desire to move past unhappy relationships. This slogan is often heard at the beginning of the year. As a way to tell yourself “Its over!” But is it really? We have learned some of the qualities of a SB and can point that person out if we see or hear some of those SB characteristics. Now, a SB doesn’t stay a SB all of their life. Eventually, they come around. Often coming to realization that they deserve better. The beginning stage of the Recovering Bitch is when they, as an SB, remove themselves from any remnants of the past.
During the transition from SB to RB, a person is feeling completely lost. Its during this time that the SB is vulnerable. They are observing the relationship, placing fault on themselves, and even think about going back to their messy situation. How do you know you are transitioning to the stage of RB? Well, it’s the decision to ultimately want to fight for yourself, and no matter what emotions are present you decide not to go back.
In the next series of articles, we will examine the strength of the RB as they attempt to journey the road back to a healthy, happy life. I want my readers to gain an extra perspective on the things they need to know in order to move past being the SB. This information will be extremely useful and will successfully place the now RB back into the world as a useful member of society.
Stay tuned…
Follow me @JayHue_TheMogul

Resolutions in 2011

Its a New Year! Hello to 2011. For a lot of people, 2011 is going to be their year. People are working hard trying to figure out what things they are going to do differently than in 2010. In order to make the New Year a great year, you should set goals that are relevant to what you want to accomplish. 
You must establish a purpose for why you want to accomplish these goals. What are you reasons behind wanting to do something different? These questions have to be answered in order to put your goals into motion.
People like to set goals but don’t actually work to fulfill them. We are all guilty of this. So how do you carry out your wish list without making it just another piece of paper on the refrigerator?
Here are some tips to use when you are writing those resolutions. They will ensure that you have a prosperous year.
Be specific. Explicitly say how you are going to accomplish each goal. For example, a goal could be to save money. Don’t just say “I want to save money in 2011.” Your list should reflect HOW you are going to do so.
Be realistic. Don’t set goals that you know you can’t accomplish. This creates unwanted frustrations.
Have a limit to what you’re trying to accomplish in a year. The list shouldn’t be a full page. Yes you want to change a lot of things but take baby steps. Setting to many goals creates anxiety when you fail to complete the entire list.
Be proactive. Take the necessary steps ahead of time needed in order to get your resolutions going. Just because its on a list, doesn’t mean its just going to happen because you want it to.
Make the most of your New Year. Remember positivity is the key to a happy and healthy year. Your goals should be chosen wisely and necessary actions should be taken to make certain they are fulfilled.
@JayHue_TheMogul on Twitter

Walking Alone

Are there times when you feel like the more good you have going on, the more bad or evil things come your way?
What will you do when you do not know what to do?
Are you constantly searching for the reasons why things in your life are not changing?
Well if you are then I must ask you to look to God!  God knows what he is doing in your life and has a purpose for you.  He does not want you to handle every situation in your life on your own.
In fact, that is impossible to do.  How can you handle everything on your own without seeking his guidance?
There is nothing wrong with praying and talking to God because he is not judgmental.  I encourage you to do so!  You will then be able to see things more clearly and make better life decisions.
 As his children, we have to make acceptable sacrifices and in return he will lead us down the path of righteousness.
We must stop trying to make sense of things or situations that do not make sense at all.
Living under pressure and striving under pressure is not the life that he wants us to live.
Live a life of repentance.
Learn how to live and walk in Christ.

Seasons come and Seasons go

Going through day to day life you will encounter several people and have some type of relationship with each one, be it associate, friend, co-worker, boyfriend/girlfriend, etc. Each one serves a different purpose for furthering our growth and development but a lot of times, especially when dealing with matters of the heart, we find it hard to let go once the relationship has run its course. This lack of letting go will eventually end in heartbreak but it doesn’t have to.
                As a young child we are taught the seasons of the year and during these seasons different things happen to the plants and animals. Spring is the time for planting, Summer is the time for growing, Autumn is the time for harvesting and Winter clears everything out to start fresh again in Spring. Relationships are the same way- you meet, get to know each other, gain benefits from the relationship but over time there is no longer an exchange and the relationship has met its end. “But how do I know when it’s time to clear out the old and start new?” That’s frequent questions that easiest to answer- Pay attention. When the seasons are changing we can tell from the temperature, length of days and vegetation- the same goes for us; the change could be in their attitude, actions in public and form of communication (or lack thereof). When you notice these changes communicate with the other person to see if it is something you can change to make the situation better, but if not it is best to bow out gracefully than to cling to something that’s no longer there.
No one ever said the process of letting go would be easy but it must be done or you will stifle your growth as a person over someone who undeserving of what you have to offer. Keep a close watch on the seasons in your relationship and never settle for less than you are worth. I am a firm believer that there is a perfect partner out there for everyone and that you should never give up until you find the one meant for you.