I can’t blame Drake lyrics for this but I kinda wish I could…
Is nothing private these days? We all follow (& some of y’all are) those people who have every emotion, every promotion, every pitfall, every ignorant or profound thought & every waking moment of their day plastered all over their social media accounts.
What makes it worse is the denial!! “I didn’t think it would cause all that! People just need to mind they business & quit lurking/stalking my page/being thirsty!” Really. -__- Unless you were unaware of how this social media thing works: whatever you post will show up on our timelines, whether we want to see it or not. Whatchu want us to do, close our eyes to the tea you’re spilling all over the world wide web? Girl please, you wanted the attention which is why you posted it instead of calling & venting to the bestie or grabbing a diary (or diary app, I’m sure they’ve made one) & scribbling your thoughts there.
While my job deals with digging into peoples lives to get information & sharing that with others, I personally am not about that life. It’s not because I fear others judgement or I have something to hide, it’s because my personal life is shared on a need to know basis -if I didn’t share it, you obviously don’t need to know!
I wasn’t always this way though. I distinctly remember in college discussing relationships with my friends & we all agreed, “If your man ain’t claiming you on social media there’s a problem!!” & “Ooh girl, they put they’re ‘In a Relationship’ on Facebook! You know it’s real!” I’ve always preferred dating more low-key guys but always felt some type of way that they isn’t plaster me all over their Facebook pages -that they barely even used. My senior year in college a guy I was dating explained to me his reasoning, “There’s a difference between private & a secret. Our relationship is private because this relationship is between two people, you & me”. Nowadays it’s hard to tell if a guy is just telling you what you want to hear or truly being genuine, either way I feel that’s a major key to a successful relationship & still follow it to this day.
Speaking of, I recently saw this article on Georgia’s Juice & she made some similar & very valid points I had to share with y’all.
People always ask me who am I dating and why am I not married yet. Usually these questions are accompanied with the connotation that something must be wrong with me since I am still single. The reality is my real reality isn’t posted all over social media.
I’ve dated, been in a relationship, had my heartbroken and went through an ugly custody battle all without sharing any of it on social media.
The most challenging part about it is being with someone who you truly love and care about that doesn’t understand why you don’t profess your love for them on social media. It seems like in 2014, people value what you do on social media more so than what you do in real life!
In my experience posting about your relationship only causes a lot of issues, here are the first seven I could think of. Feel free to leave any I forgot to mention below.
1. It Gives Haters and Frenemies an opportunity to “prey” on your significant other – Once you upload an “usie” and you’ve tagged your “bae” your followers go follow and friend request your new boo. Now they are looking through photos of him/her making an assessment of who they are, trying to find something bad to say about them and finally some may go to the extent of flirting with them online to try and get them to engage!
2. It Makes Public What Is Meant To Be Private – In my opinion romance is one of those things that is meant to be private! Of course, to each their own, but it just seems that once you change your relationship status the force of Facebook is against you.
3. It promotes drama! Yes the drama, it gets deep and messy! – Even if you only have a few Facebook friends, You never know who is friends with your Facebook friends or who might take a screenshot of something you post and share it. I knew Facebook was a hot mess when I seen an old friend from my childhood posting photos with my friend from high school’s baby daddy. I didn’t pick up the phone to talk about it but later on in my timeline the two girls were going back and forth! Needless to say, if she would have kept her relationship off of Facebook they may have made it! #DoinTooMuch
Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not judging anyone for what they do with their personal social media pages. You have every right to post whatever you want, whenever you want & how often you want. Just don’t be surprised when people break out the popcorn to watch your Young & The Restless.